Sunday, August 13, 2006

Life’s funny challenges.

Sometimes life throws us a ridiculous challenge. We may tell our friends about it or hide it, but to move forward in life, we grit our teeth and get through it. My ridiculous challenge is that I hate to fly in airplanes. I’m terrified of it and with every step I take closer to the plane, it feels like I am taking steps to death.

I didn’t used to fear flying. I have traveled all over the world, have “almost died” on several occasion (ask me to tell you about the bus ride in the Himalayas!) and had made peace with my maker.

Now though, I’m a true chicken shit of the skies. My motto used to be “have toothbrush, will travel.” Now it’s “do we have to fly there?” or “cluck, cluck, squawk!”

I realize that this is really, an irrational fear. It began soon after I started having children. Perhaps it’s the hormones or something, because I’ve heard similar tales from other moms. My hope is that the “fear of flying hormone” will diminish over the years, so that by the time my kids are off to college, I can happily resume my globe trotting ways, or at least not be terrified to fly the 30 minutes to Dallas!

Maybe it’s a self generated fear, to prevent me from focusing on the really scary stuff in life, or maybe it’s a manifestation of the vulnerability of motherhood, but it really does feel like I might die. I’m not one to back down from a fight though, and in a strange kind of way, overcoming these ridiculous challenges gives me perspective and reconfirms the living of life!

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